Question your way to happiness and self-belief
What am I doing here? Why am I like this? Why do people always hurt me? How do I make more money? What’s my life purpose? What do I do to live more in the Now? And so many more questions we keep rattling to ourselves daily…
Out of a big list of take homes from my 3 fab days with Dave Rogers and the Team of #rockyourbusinessmalaysia in 2015, was – The Power of Asking Effective and the Right Questions. Thank you Dave and all our loving Global Sages Anne Tham, Melinda, Paul Zaman, Jasmine, GreenMan Matthias Gelber, Maverick Foo, Jason Moriarty and all others for your presence and great sharing that propelled the energy to come up with more focus to share with people on the importance of “Asking Right.”
It just reconfirmed all my past work on how important it is to Ask the Right things and in the Right way – whether to the Universe or to Life or to People.
We ask ourselves questions all day long.
“Where are my keys?” “What do I want for lunch?” “What should I do next?” Sometimes the questions we ask serve us. At other times, they do us a disservice. “Why can’t I do anything right?” “Why do I attract all the wrong people in my life?” are examples of such questions. Our brains will always attempt to answer our questions, even if it has to make up the answers. 99% it concocts it and is God darn well trained to do that.
Asking yourself better questions is a great way to improve your life. Next time you face a challenge or abrupt behavior from someone, do not ask “Why this happened?” “Why do people do this with me all the time?” etc. Instead take a few steps back and see it from a higher viewpoint. As yourself “What is this situation teaching me? What can I change in my life to implement this learning? or What within me is unhealed which invited the certain behavior from the person? What within me needs to be addressed?” When you shift your focus to these questions, you shall move towards creating a definitive shift in your life.
Better questions will result in getting better answers and thereby better, positive outcomes. Develop a set of questions that you can ask yourself before you even get out of bed. These questions should serve to motivate you and get you in the mood to have a great day. Consider these examples:
“What can I do to enjoy work today?”
“What am I grateful for in my life right now?”
“Whom can I help today?”
“What step can I take today to be one more step closer to my goals?”
“What are the 5 things I can daily write to myself that bring me happiness?”
And many others like this. Try these ideas to harness the power of asking more effective questions. Develop your own questions to inspire and motivate you!
Pay attention to the questions that your inner chatter asks yourself throughout the day. Make note of the questions that make your life more challenging. Correct yourself on the spot and come up with a better question. As an example, “Why can’t I ever be on time?” could become, “What can I do to be on time from now on?” You will be surprised by the number of questions you habitually ask yourself which are dis-empowering. We are all sabotaging ourselves at some level each day. We can turn the tables and support ourselves instead.
Do you think a highly successful person asks the same questions every day that the average person asks? Most probably not. Successful people ask questions that empower them and the people around them.
Apply the same idea to your interactions with others. Many of the questions we ask others make them defensive, and a solution becomes more difficult to find. Instead, ask questions that help you both. For example, if one of your employees or friends isn’t getting along well with his family, or co-workers or vendors and associates, you could ask him, “What can we do to increase the level of harmony within our group?” This is more effective than asking, “Why the hell can’t you ever get along with anyone?”
The effectiveness of your communication and choosing the right words shall increase dramatically simply by asking better questions and using the answers wisely. Ask questions during challenging times. When you first notice yourself slipping into a negative emotional state, use questions to find a solution. Questions focus our attention and we can then magnify the outcome.
When your attention is on solutions, you tend to find solutions. When your attention is on the challenge or problem, the challenge tends to grow. It’s the simple Universal Law of “Where your Focus Goes; Energy Flows and Grows.”
Ask questions that support your goals. If you’re trying to lose weight, ask yourself about healthy food choices. “What could I eat for lunch that would taste delicious but still support my weight loss goal?” Develop some questions that will assist you in accomplishing your goals. Create a set of questions to ask yourself at the end of the day. Many of your morning questions might be suitable. Ask yourself about your day.
“What was great?”
“What did you learn?”
“How will you do better tomorrow?”
“What could you have done to avoid a situation or to respond to it better?”
Questions are a powerful aspect of language. They determine our clarity and ultimately have a profound effect on our level of success. We can use questions to improve our relationships with ourselves and others. They can even help us to have a good day and a restful night’s sleep.
Asking more effective questions is a powerful tool. Cultivate this power and propel its energies to resonate in all areas of your life. You shall see yourself improving in surprising and magnificent ways. The Universe is not just listening but constantly eves dropping on that which we intent, think, speak and ask. So get to the drawing board, of taking the first step and THINK…..”What are the effective and empowering questions I can ask each day to myself and others?”
Happy Asking 😇💖